Follow the Joy: Celebrating a Journey of IVF
People often ask me: “how do you openly celebrate a journey of IVF and support women who are having babies?”
Well, let’s face it, it’s emotional but I love my Doula work. Any pangs of pain are a treasure to me, because it shows how deeply I have loved and do love.
Once you witness the birth of a new family, the moment is so beautiful and sacred, you can feel nothing but gratitude for being witness to it.
IVF is a long journey.
Hard, confusing, and it is stressful.
It is a journey that is riddled with emotional ups and downs.
For me, I cope with a little bit of coffee here, some chocolate there and late night binges of whatever I find in the pantry. Although sneaky snacks are so satisfying, an ideal in the middle of the night, do they truly help with my emotional roller coaster ride? I am convinced it helps LOL
But all snacks aside, when I think about it, I do appreciate the variety of feelings I’m currently privy to.
It reminds me of the unpredictability of my life. How control is not in our hands. It is our job just to ride.
On the days that I am needing a song to match my mood or I am needing a lift, my go to is often “Jesus take the wheel”, to remind me that this experience, this road, is not mine to control but mine to witness, to make it tangible and real.
I am fortunate in the sense that I have had years to prepare myself for this experience. It was never a secret or surprise that this would be a chapter in my life story, but there are still moments to catch me off guard and I feel the jealousy creep in momentarily.
Jealousy. Such an insidious emotion.
It creeps in to the thought processes and without proper monitoring, next thing you know, the mind is riddled with negative thought.
Recently my little brother and his wife announced they were pregnant and for a nano second I felt jealous. It came from my disappointment in myself and how my body has failed so far even with a husband who has “super sperm”, as the docs say (oh my gosh you should’ve seen the grin on his face when he got that news).
But then I realize I haven’t failed, my journey is not yet done.
As my mind stops swirling and I take a breath, that is when the thought that gives me true terror emerges.
The thought of missing out.
Missing out on:
The memories to be made.
The moments with those who have supported me, that have always loved me, celebrated with me and grieved with me.
So, when all is said and done and you take a good look at priorities, ask the question:
How will I not miss out on the joy?!
My love for my tribe, and the gratitude I have for them will always be my number one priority. I will not let my selfish desires monopolize on the happy moments to be had.
So, as I go on this crazy IVF ride, I will continue to eat my midnight snack’s, listen to my songs on full blast and witness my moments, whatever they may be.
Live the life you are given, and remember to follow the joy.
If you are struggling to conceive and would like to find the joy in your journey contact our Life Coach for a one on one session today!